How many times have you come across this scenario: the airplane is completely full, apart from nine seats, but those nine seats have only three people in them, who are stretched out and happily slumbering away?
Did they pay for those extra seats? No, they have perfected the technique that I’ll call “seat shuffling.”
Unfortunately, when the flight you are on is completely full, you are almost certain to be stuck with the seat that you were assigned. But when the flight isn’t full, there may be definite reasons to switch and certain tricks of the trade to learn.
First of all, what constitutes a good reason to move? Here is a real list of my favorites:
1. The crying and yelling baby right next to you looks as if it
should have been named Damien, whose head is about to start spinning around any moment.
2. The smell of someone around you, from rotting feet, gas or a bad
case of body odor, and is more than you can handle.
3. Your reading light or movie audio isn’t working, and it’s a
night flight.
4. The lady next to you has her eyes wide open, and every time you
move she yells, “What was that?”
5. The man next to you keeps chanting to himself, and swatting at
imaginary flies.
6. An elderly man sits down next to you, and you get drunk from his
breath.
7. The young man sitting next to you is dressed in a cutoff shirt,
shorts, and flip-flops. And he boarded the plane singing, “You gotta fight, for your right, to PAAAARRRTTYY!”
8. You’ve got a headache, and the person sitting next to you starts
to tell you his life story from age three.
9. The person sitting next to you is so big that half of his body
is spilling over into your seat.
10. And my biggest personal peeve is the young boy behind you who
kicks your seat every other second and his mother doesn’t stop him.
Now for some insider advice on switching seats. First, you have to find out if the flight is full or not. Odds are that if they’re asking for volunteers to take another flight, it’s probably full. The best way to find out is to ask the agent when you check-in, or a flight attendant when you board.
1. Don’t be the first to board. As a matter of fact, be one of the
last. Flights rarely leave earlier than their scheduled departure time, and if they do there will be plenty of last call announcements. This way you can check out your seat and the people sitting around it; pass it by and see if there is a row empty, or a better seat. If there is, sit down as if it’s yours. If someone comes to claim it, then just play dumb, excuse yourself and move on. There is less likelihood that someone will claim it towards the end of boarding.
2. If you are already seated and have your eyes fixed on an empty
row, odds are that ten other people also do. Just take the chance and move there. If you want to save yourself the embarrassment of being ejected from your seat, then you need to know when those spare seats are definitely not going to be utilized. The signal for that is when the ground agent or the chief purser makes the announcement “Will all ground staff please disembark,” and they give their little airport farewell speech. That is your signal that the door is, or is about to be, closed, and no further passengers will be boarding. All the spare seats in each respective class are now up for grabs.
3. Go to the back of the airplane and, in a nice and courteous
manner, inform the flight attendant about the problem with your assigned seats. We respond to kind hints.
4. Upon check-in, always ask to sit in the front part of the cabin.
It is usually the section with a few more inches of legroom. Flights are usually booked from the back to the front.
5. If you can, always offer your seat when they ask for volunteers
to take another flight. It usually involves flight credit and an upgrade. If they end up not needing your seat, the gate agent is more likely to respond to your request for a change.
6. Check in early. Some of the best seats are held until the day of
departure, so showing up early could be your best shot. Ask for an exit row seat, as they are usually roomier and no children under 13 years are allowed to sit there.
7. Be careful switching seats at the airport. Ask the gate agent to
look for a better seat without canceling your currently reserved seat.
This way you won’t end up in a worse situation.
8. Check-in again. Many times the gate agent will tell you that
there are only middle seats left, but misconnects often happen and the good seats go empty while you are wedged into a seat in the very back.
Before boarding check, with the gate agent one last time.
9. Leave your overhead bags where they are. Just because you move
seats doesn’t mean you have to move your bags. I have seen many people lose a great seat because they wasted time relocating their luggage.
Time is of the essence in those matters.
10. On a three-seat configuration, look for the couple who have
booked the aisle and window seat, hoping the middle will remain vacant.
If you don’t like the looks of your current seat, many couples would rather sit together, leaving you with an aisle or window. That backfired one time on me as the couple I was between happened to be in the middle of a horrendous fight. They didn’t want to sit together and I ended up being the moderator in the middle, but every other time it worked.
Unfortunately, with fares so competitive these days it’s not as easy to get that much sought after empty row, or spare neighbor seat, especially on international flights. There are lucky exceptions though, so good luck, and let the shuffling begin. Let me know what works for you.
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