Don’t let TSA holiday lines get you down: 4 tips
We’re funny creatures. Staring at the security lines in Miami International Airport reminds me of this fact. The strands of people weave in and out of the rope lines until they reach the defining moment where it breaks up into eight different paths leading to the X-ray machines.
Here, the security line games begin.
The agonizing look creeps across each person’s face as they are forced to make a quick decision regarding their path. We’ve all been there. The pressure’s on so we have to gather as much information as possible: the number of people in each line, the pace of the TSA workers leading each line, we’re searching for the young family with the overflowing baby stroller that will undoubtedly slow the line.
With a step into one of the lines, we select our “counterpart” - someone in one of the other lines we choose as our “measuring stick.” When we reach the X-ray machine two or three persons ahead of our counterpart, we’re ecstatic. When our counterpart reaches their X-ray machine ahead of us, we’ve lost the game.
As the holiday security lines swell this season, play the game for entertainment purposes only! Don’t let this mental gambling heighten any anxiety you may be already experiencing. To ease the tension, carry these practices with you during your wait in line:
• Breathe deeply.
• Enjoy your spot in line – people watch or meet someone new.
• Say “thank you” for wherever you are heading.
• Smile.
Jason Barger is author of Step Back from the Baggage Claim: Change the World, Start at the Airport.
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4 Responses to “Don’t let TSA holiday lines get you down: 4 tips”
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I’ve been through LAX, which has separate lines for “expert” “casual” and “family” travelers. Yet they are nothing more than a recommendation and in fact there was a guide there pointing people to whichever line was the shortest, regardless of their traveling status. What’s up with that? :-(
TSA will tell you that the expert, casual family etc lines are staffed by TSA while the guy steering you into the lines is a ‘private contractor’ not under their control. You watch, that’ll be the bureaucratic response.
Further, whats it matter if you get in the slow or fast line? Its not like the amount of time difference ever matters, unless you are dim enough to get in line behind three elderly folks, wheel chairs, a few people who you KNOW never travel [evidenced by boarding passes willy nilly and no id anywhere to be seen along with wearing boots they can't get off] and the parents with three kids, 13 carry-on bags with the mother breastfeeding. . ..
don’t laugh. I was in a line at SFO right next to a line that looked just like that.
The only time it really matters where you are in the line is when you’re running late for your flight, then it’s your own fault (unless of course you arrive really early and the airline put you on an earlier flight).
I always look for the shortest line as I know that all the internal metal in my body will set off the screening machine. I have my grandchildren go ahead of me and have them watch grandpa light up the machine. I hope someday that JFK will get the machine that undresses you and I do not care what they see. At my age if I can give some TSA employee a thrill - I’m happy.